192: Les Chats

I like cats. I don’t much care for dogs. Sorry. I know that is a deal-breaker for a lot of you out there in cyberspace, but there it is: I like cats.

First of all, cats are only recently approaching the genetic manipulation that dogs have been subject to for centuries. Consider what breeding differences must have occurred to produce such differences as exist between Chihuahuas and Bull Mastiffs? Dogs are GM pets, kinda like irradiated meat, as far as I am concerned.

And I like the scent of a cat. NO, not the litter box, stupid, the CAT. Dogs have a personal hygiene and body odor problem that I just don’t care for. And to make that even worse, they want to spread their scent all over YOU. They smell your crotch, slobbering, and then slobber everywhere else on you they can reach, too. Cats don’t (usually) indulge in that behavior towards their humans. They might lick you a little, but even then, it’s not dripping, slimy, drooling slobber. I think the grossest movie scene I ever saw (still gives me full-body shudders to recall it) was one in one of the Beethoven movies where the kid and that monstrously slobbering dog were sharing: SHARING: an ice-cream cone. YYEEeeecccchhhhhhh.

Plus, you have to walk a dog. He has to go potty outside, and that requires your active participation when he needs to go. In the city, you even have to take a little plastic bag and a scooper, so dog-lovers, don’t whine at me about my cat’s litterbox: you are scooping poo, too. Take the dog for a walk to go potty? No, thank you. I have a litter box in a private corner and I can attend to my pet’s bathroom needs at MY convenience, not at THEIRS.

Plus, bathing a cat is almost non-existent. Unless they encounter a REALLY unusually messy scenario (it does occasionally occur) you don’t have to bathe a cat. And cats are smaller, usually, so they cost less to feed than a dog does. And very few cats require haircuts. NONE of mine have required a haircut, or toe-nail polish.

Besides, getting a dog into your lap is problematic, except for toy breeds. All cats fit in a lap, unless you are going for the Guinness Book of World Records with your cat, which is not good for you OR the cat. And dog fur does not feel as nice as cat fur, either.

I’ll keep my cats, and you can keep your dogs. We’ll agree to disagree.


One thought on “192: Les Chats

  1. Love both, but I am definitely not sharing my ice cream cone 🙂

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