459: Security Blankets, and Letting Go

You have been warm and comforting (a little tattered around the edges, true), solid and there for so long that contemplating moving on without you is a scary business. However, moving on is what I am doing. For my own good, and coincidentally for your own good, too, I am going to move on. It is not just for me that I do this and make this choice. You need it at least as much as I need it, and since we both so clearly need it, one of us has to make the choice to do it, and I guess that one is me. Does not mean that I like it, or that I do it without real trepidation.

You have a new career, fresh, sparkling with opportunities and new chances, floored with solid earnings and a good future. You are already moving on. This is a good thing, and very, very much what you needed to do.

What I need to do is the same thing, in another direction. Does not mean that I don’t care about you. Does not mean I won’t miss you. But you can be so much more without me than you are with me. I want that for you, and I think you deserve it.

In the meantime, I need to see if I can find myself again, since I am no longer the person I used to be, either. I have six months to pull it together, and six months is quite some time for introspection, character-building and flaw-fixing. Let’s see how we both do at it! Let’s take our “before” pictures and show off our “after” pictures in six months…..Ready, Set……..GO!


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