536: Endings


Some things end peacefully, easily, smoothly, calmly. *Some* things end that way, but my life (and my luck) don’t usually work out like that. When something ends, quite often, it isn’t nice. Quite often when something ends, it is downright painful. And no, I am not talking about ordinary, everyday things like the ending of a meal, or the ending of a novel (although, truth be told, I’ve had a few of those cause me some angst, too). The endings I am discussing are a little bigger. Things like relationships, jobs, chapters of life, lives themselves (whether human or animal).

When something big ends, it is seldom a smooth, painless process, even when it is a necessary, unavoidable, or even a healing process. There is still some stuff to sort, and some more stuff to deal with. I always said lessons cost you time, money, or both. That’s true, but they also frequently cost you pain in addition to the time and/or money. Some things are so traumatic they trigger Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, which by the way, has nothing to do with war. It is any traumatic event that you are unable to process and get beyond, and you relive it in all its horror over and over. Thankfully, for most of us, those events do dull with a reasonable amount of time and we can move on. But an accident, surgery, a rape, a mugging – any event that traumatizes you can cause it.

You’d think I’d get used to it by now, these endings, and it would not be such a big deal every time one of them happens.  As if the process and the maturity of understanding it makes it hurt any less.



4 thoughts on “536: Endings

  1. Endings are often the beginning of something new.
    So, when I find myself in a stressful ending, I try to focus on seeing the wondrous new that will fill the void…. Consider the wild fires Yellowstone had a few years ago – they destroyed a lot, and it was easy to fell as if life would never return, yet as spring came, brave new shoots emerged from the ashes.

  2. I’ve gotten to the point (at least I HOPE I have…) that I can move on quickly from anything thrown at me. Jobs are the scariest. (Thank God my health hasn’t been an issue)
    Jobs are the cornerstone to maintaining everything else. They provide for the essence of the fun things, the survival things. Somehow, and through grit, timing and honest to goodness sheer luck….I land something else in the 11th hour. I hate it, but it happens. I’m not sure if it makes you stronger, or just numb to it more. A thicker hide, a stronger backbone, I don’t really know. The lingering pessimism and depression doesn’t dissipate as much as I hoped for. But I am still here and still ticking. And finally, what lessons did I learn from my endings? As soon as I figure them out clearly…I will let you know. 🙂

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