600: Old and New

I have purchased another house. This one isn’t new, either, which means there are things that need to be fixed to suit me (and others, if I should decide that I don’t want to continue living in this place until I go to my great reward in the hereafter).


Older homes become dated-looking. No matter how spiffy your home once was (at the very pinnacle of fashion), things change. That nifty and trendy avocado or burnt orange color scheme that was so popular once – isn’t now. Unless you want to maintain that home in the 1970’s style as a hipster showplace, there will be things to change and work to be done to bring the home into the current era. This is necessary even when the old, dated stuff is still mostly functional, especially if you ever plan on selling the home again at some future date.

Then, there are the things that some other occupant/owner of the home did in some previous iteration that you stand gazing at in absolute wonder and stupefaction, scratching your head and wondering, WTH? This includes funky things like:

  • a bedroom that can only be accessed by going though a bathroom, or, not quite so egregious: another bedroom (????)
  • a toilet installed smack in front of a bathroom door with one foot clearance between the front of it and the sink cabinet, such that it becomes a tripping hazard. Did they step OVER it to get into the bathroom previously?? And, when it comes to using that toilet, whose legs are that short?
  • a kitchen with no lighting fixtures. At all. Not even one. ?? You had lamps – in the kitchen?
  • the ever-popular favorite – doors installed so close to each other that each interferes with opening the other.
  • an elaborate, attached to the roof, shingled, installed cover for the central heat and air unit that funnels rain water right smack into the back door. In floods. Did it never rain while you were there?
  • windows that are painted shut. *sigh*
  • door hardware that does not match – literally seven different styles of knobs, hinges, and finishes in the one house. Did you buy a sampler pack?
  • exposed electrical wiring, or funky outlet placements – such as running the plug for the fridge through the side of a cabinet (all the way across to the other side) to be able to plug in the fridge. Not much experience in planning, hmmm?
  • a room the size of a closet – literally three feet by four feet – that has AV coaxial cable installed in it.   ???
  • Astro-turf (literally, plastic grass) as the master bedroom carpet. Indoor sports?? Needed that look of nature? It was the cheapest floor covering they had?


Weird and questionable homeowner decisions aside, the last category of items you must deal with when you purchase a home that isn’t new are those things that are just worn out. This includes things like flooring, paint, siding, bathroom and kitchen fixtures, hot water heaters, central heat and air units, appliances, chain link fencing, the roof, and various and sundry other necessary (and costly, usually) things.

Still. I am sure that there have been people who have purchased homes I have owned who have scratched their heads over some of the things I did, too. Karma. Doing its thing.


384: Fear

I ran across a photo of a bathroom that freaked me out. (https://dirtdaubber.wordpress.com/2014/05/05/380-nope-not-happening/)

It had a glass floor that capped a several-stories straight-down drop. There is no way I would have been able to do my business in there. Not happening. In the process of checking to be sure that acrophobia was, indeed the correct and proper name for the fear of heights, I ran across this Internet gem: http://phobialist.com/#S-

I am amazed and humbled. I did not know it was possible to be afraid of so many things.


334: Movieland

I have movies I have seen that left  me wondering what in the world I spent nearly two hours watching that for? What a waste. And then, there are those magical ones that you actually search out to purchase. The good ones. The really GOOD ones.  My favorite ones are an eclectic mix of romance, science fiction, comedy, horror and drama. I used to enjoy going to the movie theater to see them, but not any more. There are  too many people who have cell phones and don’t mind at all having them go off during the movie, and carrying on long, involved conversations, usually right in the middle of the best parts of the film.

Much better to see them in my own home, where I can get popcorn that does not cost an arm and a leg, and I can pause the movie if I have to visit the restroom – and MY restroom is clean, thank you very much. And I don’t (usually) have to wait in line. Much better all the way around – I don’t even have to dress up! And the movie does not start until I am ready for it to start, and I can have a warm, purring kitty in my lap, all of which does not happen at the theater.

What are some of my good ones? Enemy Mine, Galaxy Quest, Cold Mountain, Tank Girl, The Rocky Horror Picture Show, Sommersby, Gone With the Wind, Braveheart, Mad Max, Waterworld, The Postman, Road Warrior, Tim, The Thorn Birds, The Bad Seed, Titanic, To Kill a Mockingbird, The Lord of the Rings Trilogy, the Pirates of the Caribbean movies,  Zombieland, Barry Lyndon, Ben Hur, Bull Durham, Dr. Zhivago, and a host of others I can’t recall right now, but they know they are my faves.

What are your faves? Which are the ones that come first to YOUR mind?

153: Kitty Farts

Last evening I was comfortably working away on the computer at my desk when Fez, my little feline laptop, hopped up into my lap for a cuddle. She settled down across my legs, commenced purring, and graciously accepted her just due – copious petting strokes and scratches from me, in between fits of typing.

When I went too long between pets, she would “make bread” on my leg, inserting just enough claw to remind me that she was there, and that she wanted another pet. As I was typing, I became aware of kitty potty/litter box stench, and assumed some other feline in the house (there are four) had made use of the litter box facilities – in the worst way. Being trapped in place with Fez in my lap, I ignored the smell, knowing it would soon dissipate, which it did. But then, moments later, there was a fresh wave of smell. I groaned aloud this time, and asked the air in general, OK, who did it THIS time? Again, the noxious smell soon dissipated, and I realized I was getting sleepy from all the computer work, and perhaps a short nap would refresh me.

I gently removed Fez from my lap and retired to the bedroom, with Fez following. She likes nap time, too, and often I refer to her as my sleeping buddy. We settled into the covers, and she assumed her favorite nap time position,  curled up under the covers, on my chest and belly, still purring. I teasingly told her I would not pass gas under the covers  in honor of her position, and I would appreciate it if she would return the favor. No sooner than I had spoken, I heard a cute little *pfft* of air, kinda like when you spray a tentative spray of perfume on your wrist from the perfume tester in the store. A horrible greenish-gas cloud stench rolled up from under the covers – my charming little Fez had passed really impressive gas mere inches from my highly offended nose. I had not realized when I warned her about passing gas that it really had been HER creating the bathroom smells from my lap while I was typing.

I guess if you love your  children, you accept them, flaws and all. Besides, she still has a ways to go before she can match my husband in the family gas-producing event. He still holds the trophy.

41: Bathroom Experience

The bathrooms – you know, that is a stupid word for a public toilet that has no means of taking a bath. The restrooms – wait a minute – that word is not appropriate, either, because nobody in their right mind would want to “rest” in there. The “toilet rooms” at our school have nice steam heat radiators installed in them. Currently, as I write, it is the last day of November 2011. There was a heavy frost on the grass and cars as I walked to work/school this morning. About 9:30 a.m., my morning cup of tea had percolated down to the point that it was requesting release – rather strenuously.

So, I retired to the ladies’ “toilet room.” I immediately noticed there was a decided chill to the air. I checked the radiator – the temperature setting showed what should have been a comfortable 23 degrees Celsius, but that was not what I was feeling at the moment. I cautiously touched the metal radiator: stone cold. UGGGHHHhhh. I might as well be doing my business outside!

Accepting the inevitable, I chose a stall and undid my nice, warm clothing, and, being female, gingerly perched on the ice-cold seat. YEOUCH!! Let’s just say that was the swiftest restroom, uh, toilet room break of my LIFE. And washing my hands in that freezing room was not much fun, either, especially since the hot air hand dryer is not working – I reported that thing was broken a month ago. Must make mental note to report it again. And again.

Why is there no heat in the res, uh, toilet room? Is it so that, like me, the students will request permission to go there only when ABSOLUTELY necessary, and not waste time taking their time while there? If that is the reason, someone here has a nasty sense of humor. That outhouse experience was not fun. I wonder if I can hold it until I get back home, where it is warm??