560: Heebie-Jeebies


I have garnered the lead female role in a play, the Thirty Nine Steps. Actually, I play three different females in this play, all of whom interact with the male romantic lead. Who just happens to be my husband in real life. I get to kiss him onstage. More than once. In public. With an audience. Woo-hoo.

There are a lot of lines to learn. In a fairly short period of time. This is exciting, and scary, all at the same time. I am having performance anxiety issues, here, and I haven’t even performed yet. Worrying about things that may never happen. I’m pretty good at that, actually…..darn it.

I will choose to re-direct that snotty little voice in my head, and tell it that I will be wonderful, rave reviews, fantastically good time had by all (including me). I will not listen to internal negative thoughts of forgetting lines, or tripping onstage, or having wardrobe issues – I will have a great time in three accents: German, Scottish and plummy British. And I will kiss my husband, leading man, with gusto and fervor. Woo-hoo!



346: Abused Again

In this present world in which we live, you buy an airline ticket, show up at the airport several hours early, clear inspection and fly, right?


You buy your ticket, show up at the airport several hours early, and the TICKET AGENT denies you boarding. On the plane that leaves in an hour. For which you hold a paid ticket. For which you are not getting a refund, thank you very much, freshly screwed person. For which you will also miss your connecting flight, for which you also hold a paid ticket. Thank you very much, and F@#% you again, because the connecting flight says it’s not their fault you missed their flight – and they are right – it is the TICKET AGENT’S fault you missed your flight.

It does not matter that you did your research prior to purchasing your flight tickets, to be sure that there were no pesky visas that you were supposed to obtain in advance. No, the TICKET AGENT says you need a transit visa the German Embassy Web site said you did not need, and because the TICKET AGENT says you need this visa which you don’t need, you are not getting on your flight. And when you call the Germany Foreign Relations Office, they tell you that they do not intervene with airlines – not even to tell them what their own German visa regulations are. Leaving the TICKET AGENT as the sole authority over your two thousand dollars worth of paid airfare. Which you just lost. Without even a blow job as compensation, thank you very much.