590: Respect for Humans

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I love you.

You are another human bean, sprouting,

growing into the best human you can be – being.

You are completely, totally, irrevocably unique among the billions of other beans that exist, breathe, scream, laugh, sorrow, rejoice, live….just like every other bean….totally unique.

This sense of you being the only one (which you ARE) works only so long as you remember that you are the ONE among all the other ONES.

They (ALL) deserve exactly the same high regard that you do, since they are also totally unique ONES, with all their advantages, disadvantages, successes, failures, flaws and strengths. Totally unique.

You cannot MAKE more of yourself, than another – for to do so lessens us all. You can have what you earn, what you are given, not what you take – that cost of taking is high in this life and in the next, and payment will be exacted upon you, and upon us, for what you take that you have not earned nor been given.

Live your life, and let others live their lives.

Do no harm. Try to live and do no harm.

For us all.

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588: Insisting on Unkindness

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Insisting on being, saying, doing unkindness is your choice.

It isn’t as though you are a perfect human, and therefore should be raised up as the shining example of behavior for all of humankind to emulate.

Far from it, the hatefulness you spew, from your own well of emptiness,

is a potent example of everything humankind needs, deserves, chooses to abhor.

Making a difference, inspiring change is not about pulling others down with whom you disagree,

joining with others as small-spirited as you yourself

to poke fun together at those who dare to take a stand for the hope of all.

We are not in middle school anymore. Act like it.

574: Those Who Are Important

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There are those people who are important

to me, and those who are important to you.

I trust your judgment even when

I do not trust those who are important to you.

In this, this important life that lives between us, I am not central and

you are not central. The life that lives between us, and binds us heart-to-heart,

is central.

Because of you, I choose to respect those who are important to you,

to honor the life between us.

To honor you.

565: Mea culpa maxima

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It’s all my fault.

You would not have it any other way – you cannot possibly bear any responsibility, now, would you?

Things, and people, which cannot be borne are best forgiven, and then assiduously avoided, because pain is…..painful. It is possible to think of you, now, without anger. But not without pain. Yet. When I have achieved that goal, it will be possible to remember you without sadness.

I invested in you. The money is irrelevant – it is only money, no matter how much money it was. I invested myself into you. It is now time to invest in myself, even though I don’t do that very well yet. I have spent so many years investing in others instead of me, that it is difficult to even believe I am worthy of investment.

Working on it.

On all of it.

534: I don’t know

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I don’t know.

I don’t know how it will turn out.

I don’t know if time will prove this is the right decision.

I don’t know whether I am worthy of the challenge. I don’t know if you are.

I don’t know how I will feel in five years.

I don’t know how the details will work out, if things will fall into place and make this possible.

I don’t know how others will react.

I don’t know if the results, the rewards, will prove worth the risk and effort it will take.

I don’t know how much time we will have.

What I do know is that I hope, and because of that hope, I commit to you.

For now, and for all the tomorrows I have, every day: my choice is you, and by extension, US.

THAT, I do know.

 

What I hope is good, right, worthy, love, in time, happiness, and YES, for all the time we both have left,

and for all the time to come, even after that.

 

(dedicated to Mr. and Mrs. CINOR (Constantly In Need Of Reassurance)

515: Abhor

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To be disgusted with; to strongly dislike; to regard with extreme repugnance or aversion; detest utterly; loathe; abominate. Pretty strong words.

I abhor people who do not have consideration for other people. Their words, their opinions, their beliefs, even their EXISTENCE. The conundrum to that is that people who take that lack of consideration for others to the point of killing others need themselves to be killed (to stop them from doing what they have demonstrated they are willing and able to do), forcing those of us who do not wish to harm others to commit harm to them.

I abhor irony.