575: Questioning the Divide


When there is a difference of opinion, there is a divide between us.

This isn’t necessarily a bad thing.

The distance is less of a problem than it is a safety net.

When my explanations to you are met with dismissal, and you can only keep expounding your views (which views I disagree with), that divide becomes more and more a safety zone

instead of an intellectual difference – a divide I increasingly wish to never, ever cross.

I don’t ask you what your reasons are. I believe that I understand them, and I respect that you hold those views – and I respect YOU. I have not challenged you to change your views with my facts (which you discount as valid, anyway). WHY are you compelled to challenge me?

I can love you without having to agree with you on every issue.

Why do you say hurtful things to me when you are frustrated that I have not come around to your way of thinking? When I retreat from you rather than continue to argue with you?

I do not insult you.

Have you come to the conclusion that those demons inside you that cannot be drowned (because they know only too well how to swim) must be desiccated to death in the desert instead?

I have

I don’t want to need so much safety

Please stop widening the chasm between us


439: It’s MY Opinion

I, too, have an opinion.

Sometimes there is research and experience that back up what I think about something

and sometimes it is what I think about something, period.

I don’t give a good rat’s ass what you think about what I think.

I think it, so there it is.

I have my reasons, and those reasons are sometimes nunyabizness.

You can think what you want to think (you do anyway)

and you can damn well leave me to think what I want to think, too.

If I am supposed to change my views (due to your reasons), then,


you are supposed to change your views (according to my reasons).

If you don’t like that idea, then keep your mouth shut around me.

I will do my best to return the favor.


230: Men and Dogs; Women and Cats

I have come recently to realize that in general, men are more likely to like dogs, and women are more likely to like cats. This is not to say that women can’t like dogs, or don’t like them, because many do – or that men cannot come to appreciate a cat, as some do. But recently, not that I have not noticed this previously, mind you, but recently, I have come to understand why men prefer dogs (usually) and why women prefer cats (usually).

First, dogs smell. This is not a problem for men, since there is no social barrier to men smelling. One of my male friends adopted this attitude towards his laundry that pretty much sums up this point: he used to choose an item of clothing from the floor, and ask “does this stink too bad to wear one more time?” Being smelly is acceptable, if you are male, so that is not a turn-off to preferring a dog. Women on the other hand, are usually obsessive-compulsive about personal body odor. We have been taught from infancy that we are NEVER supposed to smell (bad). So the fact that dogs have about as much of a problem in that area as the average male human tends to put off some females. There is a man at work who smells…and not good. We thought, once he got married, that the smell issue would go away, since he was now living with a woman. Not so. I just figured that she likes dogs.

Second, dogs are slobberingly slavish in their obvious displays of devoted, fawning attention. Men eat this crap up. It’s exactly the way he wants his woman to behave, as if she were totally besotted with his perfect, superhuman self. He honestly feels that he deserves this level of worship. Really. No kidding. Women, on the other hand, can actually appreciate a creature that does not stick his wet nose in your crotch while slobbering all over your designer jeans. We can appreciate a bit of space, and a little independence. Dogs do not understand the concept of independence. Men do (for themselves) but they prefer the devotion from their significant other, whether that be human or canine.

Third, men prefer a companion that is trainable. They want the companion to do as it is told, without question or hesitation. This mostly works with a dog, and sometimes it works with a woman. It does not work with cats, which is why men are suspicious of cats. Cats do what they want, not what you want. Sometimes, women do that, too, which explains why lots of men are suspicious of us, as well as cats.

Women are tactile creatures. We like the way things feel. Ever wonder why women’s clothes often come in silk or satin, and men’s seldom do? Women like the sensuous feel of silky things. Cat fur is much silkier and luscious to the touch than dog fur. Plus, when a cat licks its human, here is very seldom ever any slobber. Cas are neat, and are always cleaning themselves. Since we women spend a lot of time doing that very same thing, we understand each other.

229: Top Ten Reasons to VISIT Morocco

Morocco is a great country to visit. Of all the Islamic countries, I would hazard a guess that Morocco is one the most tolerant of other views, and other people. There are many reasons to visit the place, the great people being one of them. However, lots of places have great people. Here are ten excellent ones that Morocco has listed here:

1. Unesco World Heritage sites: Meknes, Fes medina and Volubilis. All three of these sites are within an hour’s drive of each other. the entire CITY of Meknes is a heritage site, and the medina is a treat, and not as large as the one in Fes, so you might be able to navigate it without a guide. The medina in Fes is HUGE – do not wander in it without taking notes about which turns you make, or you’ll be lost for days. Get a guide. And Volubilis? The Roman ruins? A great treat, worth seeing! Gorgeous mosaic floors in the Roman villas there.

2. Fossils. Morocco is blessed with a great selection and variety of fossils in matrix. You can get fossils individually, or get them in slabs for your custom bath, get sinks made of fossils in matrix – tables…you name it. Wow.

3. Beach. Morocco has lots of beaches – often, miles and miles of beach coastline that is virtually deserted – yours and yours alone. Plus, in the winter, storms in the Atlantic make for great surfing on the west coast, and Morocco also fronts the Mediterranean in the north, so calmer surf prevails there.

4. Desert. Morocco borders the Sahara desert on its eastern border, and you can visit the great sand dunes there in comfort, because there are riads (hotels) there that cater to desert visitors in style. Get a traditional meal, and be serenaded by Berber tribesmen in traditional constume, for an unforgettable dining occasion – plus sleep in the desert dunes in an authentic Berber tent!! Ride a camel – but watch out for the camel’s ‘dates’ in the sand. Those are not really dates…..

5. Mountains, including skiing, in AFRICA. No kidding. Within an hour’s drive of destinations in number one is Ifrane, a lovely little ski resort town in the Middle Atlas Mountains. Skiing in Africa. Who’d a thunk it?

6. Rugs. Morocco’s tribal women make gorgeous hand-made rugs – and you can purchase them for very little money. Get several – they are so lovely I use them for wall hangings.

7. Souks. These wonderful, open-air flea marker, farmer’s market, yard sale events are held once a week in most villages, and if you see one – stop and shop. They have everything under the sun, and all at great prices if you can haggle. It you can’t haggle, the prices are usually not too bad, but take a friend who likes haggling, and you’ll do a lot better, especially if the friend speaks French or Arabic.

8. Marrakech and Casablanca. Just the names of those fabulous cities evoke romance. Everyone should visit both at some point during their lifetimes. No regrets – add it to your bucket list right now.

9. Essaouria’s Genoche Music festival, an annual event, is only one international arts and music festival held in Morocco – but Essaouria is on the coast, and you can have a lovely beach vacation, at the same time!

10 and last, but not least, argan oil and gorgeous, silky caftans to show off your beautiful, nourished skin in. Argan oil is made in Morocco, among other places, and it is very reasonably priced there. Once you use it so smooth and soften your skin, you can deck yourself out in one of Morocco’s elegant feminine fashions: the caftan. A caftan is an indoor garment, rather like a set of lounging pajamas, in silky, satiny, colorful fabrics that are embellished with embroidery, beads, sequins, jewels and more. They are absolutely stunning – and so will you be wearing one!!